Wednesday, May 21, 2014

Sandman

I was dreaming.

A man was offering me a job to help his wife unpack their household goods. He gave me an address in a place I didn't recognize. I wanted to look it up before I committed, so I searched in my bag for a bit of paper, found it and a pencil, then said:
"How 'bout I call you and let you know. Can you give me your phone number please?"

As the man rattled off his digits, I wrote them down. Six digits into the ten digit phone number, a dog yelled.

"I'm sorry, I didn't get the last four numbers. Could you repeat them please?" I asked apologetically.
As the man repeated the last four numbers, a dog yelled.

"I'm terribly sorry, I couldn't hear them over the dog. Could you tell me one more time?" I asked contritely.

One more time the man repeated the last four numbers. A dog yelled.

Terribly embarrassed, I once again asked the man to repeat his phone number. A dog yelled over the repetition of numbers.

Babbling now, and trying to explain about hounds, I once again asked the man to repeat his phone number. Without losing any patience, the man did so.

Becoming more incoherent by the second, I asked again and again for the man's phone number only to have the last four digits drowned out by a yelling hound.

Finally, I woke up. Not too surprisingly, Ray was yelling.

Only sleep deprivation can make me sleep through Ray's noise. He's been waking me up every night for weeks now. Based on the presence of fox poop in our back yard and on the sidewalk out front, I deduce we have a fox in the 'hood. Despite the fact that we've been sleeping with all the windows closed, Ray knows when Monsieur Reynard arrives and he wants us to know too.

I have been SO tempted to let him out to chase the fox away but for two things:

  1. M. Reynard arrives between midnight and four in the morning. Our neighbors would NOT be pleased.
  2. Rabies  

Look, you just have to let me out once and, I promise,
that fox will never come back.

10 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. For Ray? Or for me to sleep through all the yelling?

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  2. I have a similar situation going on with Blueberry and a pesky neighborhood cat that insists on using my yard as a litter box and thinks it's pretty neat that I have a wading pool full of cool clear, drinking water. It typically comes into the yard when dark hits and if I let her, B would spend all night outside. This cat shows no fear of her and will often sit on the safety of the 6 foot fence and just watch B lose her mind running back and forth.

    Of course, Blueberry doesn't let out any yells like Ray and make my dreams turn all funky like yours - that's pretty funny!

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    1. Cats love to tease dogs when they know they can't be got at. I used to have a cat that would sit an inch away from the chain link fence while the dog next door would go absolutely bonkers snarling and barking at her. Then, after five or ten minutes, she'd turn her back to him and just saunter away. I think she liked the show.

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  3. Hmmm, I dont know that I would know what fox poop looked like. We have raccoons and 'possums, squirrels and rats in and out of the yard but not foxes. My little dog Zoe's nose is about the only sense organ that still works. She would know if there were any new poopers in the yard.

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    Replies
    1. We have a book (believe it or not) on Scat and Tracks. It's oddly accurate.

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  4. This is so funny! Last week some feral cats got to yowling outside my house at 2 am, and it went on and ON for like an hour; after the briefest flicker of ears, all three of my dogs ignored it and went right back to sleep!! Worthless watch dogs :)

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  5. HAHAHAHAHAHA! M. Renard!
    My inside kitties know instantly when there is street gang kitty on our property. And, boy oh boy, are there some mighty toughsters behind glass!

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    Replies
    1. Hahahahahahahahaha. I can relate. When we first got Moonie she would throw herself screaming at the glass door every time a cat would come around. Then she started going outside...

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