Wednesday, November 6, 2013

Election Day

"C'mon, Ray, let's go. It's crunch time," I said to my snoozing dog.
Ray, curled in his favorite chair, lifted his head from his tail and looked at me, head atilt.
"Let's go, Ray," I urged my dog to get up.
Thinking that there was the possibility of a walk, Ray crawled off the chair, stretched, and yawned.
I picked up his sweater vest and tie, grabbed a campaign button and pinned it to my sweatshirt, then hustled the candidate into the back seat of his limo and drove him to the polling place. As his campaign manager, I knew the importance of face time with local voters just before they entered the booth. As I buttoned Ray into his vest, he gave a deep sigh.
Demonstrating the Bellyrub Platform to the opposition
"Last time, Ray," I said, "It ends tonight."
I slipped Ray's tie over his head. He gave a mighty yawn, bored at the prospect of more campaign stops.
We strolled to the school entrance where campaign crews were handing out sample ballots. A woman approached us offering us the piece of paper for her party.
"No, thank you," I said, "Ray the Blind Dog is my candidate. He's running for governor."
"I've seen his signs," replied the woman as she retreated, "I see you walking all the time. Good luck."
Ray meandered over to couple of young men similarly handing out flyers, and while I explained Ray's bellyrub platform, he demonstrated.
Pressing the flesh
As I chatted with another of the campaign workers promoting his candidate for Sheriff, Ray was greeting voters. A woman with a purse dangling from one hand and a small child on the other slowed to admire the nattily dressed candidate. Sensing a child, Ray eagerly approached the duo then surprised me by ignoring the youngster and jamming his head into the woman's purse and rooting around in it.
"Sorry," I said apologizing for this egregious display of greed, "But he's like any other politician, always trying to get something from you."
Photo opportunity with a happy voter
After fifteen or twenty minutes of meeting and greeting the few voters that were trickling by, Ray and I decided that perhaps we should return at the end of the day when people were getting off of work. I chauffeured the candidate back to his cozy chair then went back to the polling place to vote. I was greeted by the same campaign worker with whom I had been chatting.
"Ray the Blind Dog emailed me," he said, "He wants you to vote for my candidate for Sheriff."
I laughed as I took the proffered sample ballot.
When I exited the polling place, the same man approached me.
"Did you come with your husband?" he asked me.
"Huh? What? No," I replied somewhat confused at the question.
"Well, I thought maybe it was your husband because he came right after you, and when I tried to give him a flyer he said he didn't want one because he was voting for Ray the Blind Dog," said the laughing man.
Thinking that perhaps Gregg had gotten off work early to vote, I asked the campaigner what the guy had looked like.
"Did he have dark hair?" I asked, helpfully describing at least a third of the world's population.
Basking in the attention of a fan.
"Well, he was a bit younger than you and about your height," explained the man.
Even though Gregg is taller I was still, not entirely sure that it wasn't him, so I called.
"Nope, wasn't me," said my lovely husband when queried.
A warm glow spread through me. Ray's campaigning had really paid off. He had secured a single vote.

Charged up at the thought, I asked Gregg to stop by and get us before he went to vote so that Ray could have one final chance to meet the voters. Gregg agreed.
We returned to the polls at dusk. It turned out to be a fortuitous time. Streams of people were coming in. As Gregg went in to vote, Ray and I stayed outside to work the crowd.
"Vote for Ray the Blind Dog!" I urged voters, "He's running for Governor, a good alternative candidate!"
Happily, some of Ray's friends and neighbors were there. Ray enthusiastically greeted everyone in a last ditch effort to secure his place in the governor's mansion.
This morning the results were in. The democratic candidate won by a slim margin.
More importantly, Ray the Blind Dog secured at least three votes.

Supportive friends...
... favorite neighbors
Worn out after a long day of campaigning
Campaign signs outside of the polling place


  1. I love all the pics, but especially the last with all the campaign signs lined up. I was reading about Virginia's candidates and came upon the second paragraph which started "but there is a third candidate in the running . . .". I so wanted to believe that Ray's name would be there.

    1. hahahahahahahaha. If only he had that kind of publicity, I know he could have gone all the way!

  2. Y'all are too much! I emailed the Today Show a couple of days ago in hopes this story would make the show, but alas, no return call :( Too bad there wasn't a news crew hanging around your polling place so Ray could have gotten a little last minute publicity, lol!

    1. Thanks for trying. Ray would have loved all that attention!

  3. LMAO!!!!! My sister-in-law asked if Ray was on the ballot, I told her to rite him in.

    1. Maybe she did. Sources tell us that Ray got FOUR votes.