Happy Easter from the Lot of Us

It was Saturday and we were waiting for Murphy.

Waiting for Godogue

The day before, I had put an emergency call into Rachel, Murphy's mom.
"Hey, can you come over this weekend?" I asked, "Ray is seriously bored. All of his friends' moms are out of town and Ray has no one to walk or play with. He's getting kinda depressed."
"That would work out perfectly," said Rachel, "We're going to Marva's this weekend, I just need to find out which day and let you know."
So, it was Saturday. As soon as I said, "Ray, who's coming?" he ran to the door to wait. He didn't know who he was waiting for, but he knew someone fun was coming.
Rachel and Josh dropped Murphy with us then went to take Marvelous Marva to lunch.
Ray and Murphy played a bit, then we went for a walk around the lake, then they dismembered the Easter Bunny. A good time was had by all.
And the best part? Murphy is coming back today with Josh, Rachel, and Marva for Easter dinner.

Hey Ray, he's behind you.

What do you mean we killed the Easter Bunny?

Well, who knew? Easter Bunny parts taste good.

Uh. Happy Easter.

She's got a WHAT?

Ray was howling at the door as Moonie and I got in the car and pulled out of the driveway. I had found it necessary to close him up in the dining room while I slipped the cat into her carrier. I was familiar with the drill because it happens whenever I take Moonie to the vet. The minute I bring the carrier inside, Ray gets anxious and jogs nervously around the house while I snag the cat and put her into the travel device. When Moonie starts yowling, Ray whines. When we leave the house, he howls and scratches frantically at the door. I'm not sure what his thought process is, I can't tell if he is worried I won't bring her back, or if he wants to go with her, but it really upsets him when I take his cat away.
I had found a lump on Moonie's abdomen the previous evening when I was giving her a bellyrub. I was pretty sure that it hadn't been there the night before that, and I was very concerned that it might be a tumor of some kind. So we were on our way to see the vet.
It was snowing, so I threw a blanket over Moonie's cage to keep the cold air off of her. As usual, she meowed the whole way there but became quiet when we arrived. We didn't have to wait for long.
"Her weight is maintaining," said Dr. Kim as she looked at Moonie's chart, "That's good. Where is the lump that you felt?"
The vet was running her hands over Moonie's belly as she asked me the question. Her hands stopped and she looked at me.
"Is this what you felt?" she asked.
I reached under Moonie, felt the lump, and nodded.
Dr. Kim said, "It's a hernia."
"Huh?" I said, thinking I had misunderstood.
"It's a hernia," repeated the vet, "Usually kittens have them. I've never seen one on an old cat like this."
"As far as I know she hasn't been moving furniture or anything," I said, "How would she get it?"
"I have no idea," replied the vet.
She told me to monitor it to make sure it doesn't get bigger and told me what great shape Moonie is in for an old cat with kidney disease. Moonie sat on the table and purred. I opened up her cage and the old cat spryly scooted in, ready to go home.
Ray met us at the door happy to have his cat home safely, then ran upstairs to tell Hugo that his sister was home.

Some help please

Do any of Ray's fans speak Russian? I have a problem and I need the help of a Russian-speaker.
Every so often, a rather unusual problem crops up with a blog. Something in it is obviously mistranslated and Russian adult content-seekers* are misdirected to Ray's blog. I know this because the blog's 'Stats' page all of a sudden shows a spike in hits for a particular posting (a couple hundred pageviews instead of the usual 39.5).
"How do you know it's Russian adult-content-seekers?" you ask.
I know because, also on the 'Stats' page, is a list of the referring websites and URLs. I have learned the hard way not to click on any of these referring websites and URLs if they are dot ru (i.e. Russian).
So here's my problem. In the past when this happened, I was able to take a guess at the word or phrase in the blog that was probably causing the misdirection and was able to change it to something else. This time, I have NO idea what it is about this blog that is causing adult-content-seekers to visit Ray's blog.
So here is the link to the posting that is causing the problem.
POSTING HAS BEEN DELETED**
If any of you have any ideas as to what needs to be changed, please let me know.

* Notice my cagey use of "adult content" instead of the word nrop - you have to read that word backwards - so that more adult-content-seekers aren't misdirected here.

**I edited and re-edited the offending post to take out as many words as possible. Then I changed the title. It was still getting hits from the adult-content-seekers. So I deleted the thing.

Equations

For those of you who remember equations from your basic Algebra class, here's some homework to keep your brain firing on all cylinders:

1. Choose the best answer below for the following equation: Moonie + y = cat head in plate; where y is equal to a plate on the table with food item noted.

a. y = beef
b. y = fish
c. y = pork
d. y = all of the above

2. Choose the best answer below for the following equation:  x + Hugo = black cat pawing at food but never really touching it; where x is equal to something Hugo wants.
a. x = salmon
b. x = pork
c. x = something, but he's not quite sure what it is, but he's sure that he wants it 
d. x = all of the above


3. Choose the best answer below for the following equation:   x + Ray = dog head in lap; where x is equal to a person eating the food item noted.  

a.  x = peanut butter
b.  x = scones
c.  x = bacon
d. x = all of the above


4. Choose the best answer below for the following equation: x + y + z = the total annoyance level of person who's space is being violated. Where x, y, and z are annoyance level, on a ten point scale, caused by Moonie, Hugo, and Ray respectively for the above types of begging.
a. x = 8; y = 2; z = 5
b. x = 5; y = 5; z = 5
c. it doesn't really matter, we don't do anything about it anyway.
d. a and c
e. b and c



ANSWERS:
1. d
2. d
3. d
4. d

There Goes the Neighborhood

Catching some Rays

"This neighborhood is going pot," said my neighbor, Bill, as he walked past my house.
"Why do you say that?" I inquired.
"Used to be when I walked around, I would see girls in bathing suits lying on blankets in the sun," he said, laughing, "Now it's just Ray the hound dog."

Poof, There he is

There are two things that I cannot do without getting the attention of the blind hound. One is pick my shoes out of the pile o' shoes next to the front door (I know I've mentioned that one before) and the other is pick his food dish off of the kitchen floor and put it in the sink to wash. No matter where he is in the house, no matter how soundly he is sleeping, no matter how quietly I perform these tasks; Ray will hear and appear.

NEWS FLASH -- Ray the Blind Dog Abandons Bone

In an unprecedented display, Ray the Blind Dog, a self-proclaimed rawhide bone lover, abandoned his favorite toy for the newer, more exciting treat-ball. 

Despite some initial misgivings on the part of Ray's person, the hound has shown himself to be a Genius Dog in the treat-extraction arena. However, treat-enjoyment has presented itself as something of a challenge to the dog because of that 'whole blind thing.' In the thrill of the chase, random treats are passed over and left abandoned on the carpet to be spotted and pointed out by Ray's caddy. The caddy is also responsible for rescuing the stray and stuck ball.

Ray's person, Jean, considers bone-abandonment to be a temporary aberration on the part of the noted rawhide-bone connoisseur.

When questioned, Jean said, "Ray went outside this morning to get his bone, but then he just dropped it on the carpet, left it, and went to play with the treat-ball. I was stunned! I think he'll come back to rawhide, though. I mean, it's not like you can play keep-away around the coffee table with a plastic cube!"

Ray the Blind Dog declined to comment on his recent obsession.

Caddy!

Caddy!

Caddy!

Oh sorry, didn't realize you were right there. 

Caddy!

Caddy!